


I knew you were trouble

by That_Ginger_004



Series: Bellarke One-Shots [4]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Character Death, F/M, I Blame Tumblr, I'm Sorry, Ouch, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-25
Updated: 2014-11-25
Packaged: 2018-02-26 23:45:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2670836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/That_Ginger_004/pseuds/That_Ginger_004
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She won’t forget Bellamy Blake, with his clear brown eyes and light smattering of freckles. She’ll remember his smile, and what his voice sounded like, and the way it felt to kiss him. To be kissed by him. But she knows that the ghost of his laugh will haunt her forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I knew you were trouble

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry. Inspired by the music video to Taylor Swift's I knew you were trouble.

_“I think when it’s all over, it just comes back in flashes, you know? It’s like a kaleidoscope of memories, when it just all comes back. But he never does. I think part of me knew the second I saw him that this would happen. It’s not really anything he said, or anything he did. It was the feeling that came along with it, and the crazy thing is, I don’t know if I’m ever going to feel that way again. But I don’t know if I should. I knew his world moved too fast, and burned too bright, but I just thought how can the devil be pulling you towards someone who looks so much like an angel when he smiles at you? Maybe he knew that, when he saw me.”_

****

Clarke remembers how she had laughed when she was out at the shooting range with Bellamy, and she had just shot her first shot. She knew that it was kind of sad, taking such delight in doing such a destructive thing, but she couldn’t help it. Call it adrenaline, or what ever.

Maybe it was Bellamy’s fault. That’s what she knew her friends would say - Monroe and Monty and Jasper. And Wells. Wells would be horrified if he could see her now. She could imagine what he’d say, and can almost picture his face in her mind when he’d say it.

But she didn’t care. She’d finally found someone who understood her. She’d been warned away from him by everyone - her mum, her friends, and even a police officer - but she wanted this. She wanted, just this once, to be a rebel. She wanted to learn what it was like to not worry about anything, and to just take life as it comes. And there was no denying that Bellamy Blake was the right person for that job.

So when he’d asked her if she wanted to get a drink with him, she’d jumped at the chance. She thought she surprised him with how eager she was to go with him, but she didn’t care. She was past caring. And when he asked her out, she hadn’t even thought about it before she said yes. She didn’t regret it either. Not like with Finn, who was just boring after a while, or Wells, who didn’t know how to take risks. No, Bellamy was new and exciting. She loved it. And yeah. The sex was pretty amazing as well.

It was a risk, she’d admit it, but then, what in life wasn’t a risk? And who wanted to stay at the sidelines and not do anything exciting in their life? Bellamy brought a whole new meaning to risk taking, and Clarke relished in the idea that she was right by his side the whole time. She loved the idea that he had chosen her to be the one that was by his side.

He was so attractive it hurt, but when she was with him she didn’t feel inadequate - quite the opposite, in fact. He had looked at her as if she was Aphrodite herself, and he made her feel like she was a queen. He treated her like one as well, giving her what ever her heart desired.

She loved him, that much she was sure of. He had smiled at her when she told him, and the burning look he gave her made her heart almost stop. He kissed her, and she had almost forgotten that she had said it when he whispered it back to her in her ear. She remembers how his breath was warm and heavy against her neck, and has to hold back a sob.

She can’t say that she wasn’t warned - that he was dangerous and reckless, and didn’t care about anyone but himself. But she loved him, and he had said it back, so it must be true, it must be true, otherwise she didn’t know what she’d do. But that didn’t explain why he was at the pub that night, and why he got blindingly drunk even though she’d asked him to be careful, and dammit, it didn’t explain why he got hit by that car, and it certainly didn’t explain why she was here right now, sitting in a tiny church that she knew he’d hate, at his funeral.

What saddened her most was the fact that it was almost empty. There was maybe five other people here - his sister, and a few of his old friends. And that was all. He had surely touched more people than that, had wanted more people to be here. And she was choking back tears because, god, she loved him so so much, and here she was at his funeral and there was only _six people here._

She wondered if her friends even knew that he was dead. She wondered what they’d say, and then she remembered that she didn’t care. But she was confused because she did care, but she didn’t want to, and the only person she wanted to talk to about all of this was Bellamy, and he was dead. He was dead and it was all her fault because she told him that night and if she had maybe waited for one more day then he would be fine. He would be annoyed at her, but at least he would be alive.

And then she wouldn’t have to raise their child alone. She thought she ought to tell his sister, but the idea of going over and talking to her and seeing his eyes was too much. So she left quietly instead, one hand over the tiny bump on her abdomen, and the other clutching the keys to his truck. Her truck now.

As she drove away from the tiny church in the middle of nowhere, she thought about what she was going to do next. A single soon to be mother, without any financial support and too much pride to go home and face her friends. Some place new, where she could start again, and make new friends. She remembers her friend from upstate, Raven Reyes, and thinks that that’s as good as a place as any.

She heads there, and she vows not to forget. She won’t forget Bellamy Blake, with his clear brown eyes and light smattering of freckles. She’ll remember his smile, and what his voice sounded like, and the way it felt to kiss him. To be kissed by him. But she knows that the ghost of his laugh will haunt her forever.

****

_"I guess I just lost my balance. I think that the worst part of it all wasn’t losing him… It was losing me."_


End file.
